Have you talked to your parents about wills? You should.

hand-229777_1280Every other article about will-writing will start its first sentence with something along the lines of ‘No one likes talking about wills…’. Well I’m here to break that stereotype. I’m the kind of person who texted my sisters with ‘wei nak IC number cepat’ in order to fill up Borang KWSP P – Borang Penama aka the form which authorises my sisters to take out my EPF deposits if I die early.

During the recent Hari Raya Haji, I was driving my mom and my sisters and the subject of our family came up. Specifically, the lack of planning over wealth distribution. I told my Mom that it’s not okay to not have a will, knowing that we have family members who are completely irresponsible over their finances and definitely not up to take care of any passed-down property or businesses. I’m trying not to be judgmental here but I make it no secret that I don’t find my brothers suitable for wealth management. You are how you act and they have acted as complete ‘please take care of me even though I’m nearly 30′ man-childs.

We talked about the Syariah system called faraid, which will automatically apply if there is a lack of formal will. The faraid system will automatically discriminate over my sisters and I simply because we have a vagina between our legs instead of a penis. Seriously, I get half of my brothers’ share because of this stupid reason?

I think that my parents are sensible people, but their love for their children will be their downfall if they don’t have a will. Growing up, I have never gotten along with my brothers. I remember them as self-entitled boys who were always quick to remind me that they were physically stronger, so I should know my place. I remember them as default leaders because Islam says so. I remember being told to make nice because they could serve as wali to give me away in marriage if my father passed away.

Sorry Mom and Dad – you might love all of us but we don’t have that kind of unconditional love towards each other. When you guys pass on, all that’s left will be your physical property and I’ll be damned if they are wasted away. I will fight to preserve my parents’ properties to ensure they don’t go down in shambles and I will most definitely fight to make sure that no one comes to my sisters and I when they finished spending their share to ask for more.

So I said all of this to my Mom, albeit a bit nicer way. But I think I drove the point, because she agrees with me and agrees to have something official written up.

My Dad, on the other hand, just said ‘yes I will’. I need to follow up with that man, because he tends to infinitely postpone things that he doesn’t like to do.

This is my family experience, but I’ve heard stories where even the best of families fight over inheritance money. At the end of the day, if a person is desperate for money, even blood can’t do anything. I’m sure you have heard of similar stories too. It’s sad, but it’s life, and in life, resources are important for survival.

If this article piqued your interest about the importance of talking to your parents to make wills, here is an amazing article on will writing and where you can make one:


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